Completing the Circle

There are times when one of us is cranky, stressed, sick, angry, selfish or just plain mean. It can be with or without a cause. But when the other one steps in and shows love instead of hurt feelings or retaliation Seth and I refer to is as completing the circle. The circle of love. When I am angry and snap disrespectfully at him and he just gives me a hug or takes the children on a walk, he has completed the circle. When he is stressed out and I've already got a mile high list of things to do and I drop it all to help him, that is completing the circle. When he says something inconsiderate and I brush it off understandingly and turn around and say something loving to him, I have completed the circle. It is a never ending relationship of give and take, but it is never balanced. We don't keep a mental score of who showed the other one kindness and who did this for the other person so now it is our turn to receive.

We all do this on a daily basis in order to keep our marriages healthy and strong. But we need to note that we all go through seasons and at one point you may feel like you are always giving and at other times you may feel like you are always receiving. It is much easier to get offended and shove the glass of water in his face after he hurt your feelings or didn't help with this or that, to be cold and aloof after he didn't say something about your new dress or ignored your overtures. So, we need to check our emotions and curb out desire to lash out carnally. Instead our response should always be love, love and more love. Patients when he's stressed, kindness when he's upset, encouragement when he is depressed, etc. And what is even harder is making sure our actions are done out of love and not obligation because it is "the right thing to do". He can sense if your heart is in it, if your still harboring hurt feelings.

As I write this I have totally failed in this area already today.1 I was hurt, deeply hurt about something. I was cold and mean. Guess what Seth did? He brought me back flowers and multiple gifts. Not to appease my anger, but to complete the circle and show his love for me. Maybe next time I can be the one completing the circle... By God's grace.